LONG WHINY POST 02.
bad mozzie woes and i think im coming dwn with a fever soon. damn.
today, i nearly gave myself away. sometimes, i write my emotions all over my face and it can be read so easily by others. (BAD) and then there would also be times when i put on this silly masquerade and bury my feelings frm the realities of life. (BAD)
either way, im always doing the BAD stuffs. Choices. They are so had to make and a myraid of considerations to ponder.
I asked myself again, what am i hankering after? There isnt a definite answer in my head now like there used to be last time. Oh. Time really flies. Soon, i'll be sitting in the hall, doing the papers (hopefully not at my wits end). Then, soon enuff, i would be able to purchase my sewing machine. Timing is evtg. So let me not waste time now. There are so many stuffs i wanna do cus i havent been doing much recently.
Today, i felt really ugly. Inside and outside. Everywhere. Im just losing myself. I see myself growing uglier and uglier day by day and more and more childish day by day. My friends grow prettier and more matured and finds the drive to do stuff. I feel inferior and i tend to shut myself out frm the world and live in my own. This is so not me. I used to be able to talk things out with ppl and share abt my feelings. But now, somehow or another, i find myself alone on earth and i somehow or another have already vanished from the crowd.
Do u feel this way too? I feel miserable. Really....
today, i nearly gave myself away. sometimes, i write my emotions all over my face and it can be read so easily by others. (BAD) and then there would also be times when i put on this silly masquerade and bury my feelings frm the realities of life. (BAD)
either way, im always doing the BAD stuffs. Choices. They are so had to make and a myraid of considerations to ponder.
I asked myself again, what am i hankering after? There isnt a definite answer in my head now like there used to be last time. Oh. Time really flies. Soon, i'll be sitting in the hall, doing the papers (hopefully not at my wits end). Then, soon enuff, i would be able to purchase my sewing machine. Timing is evtg. So let me not waste time now. There are so many stuffs i wanna do cus i havent been doing much recently.
Today, i felt really ugly. Inside and outside. Everywhere. Im just losing myself. I see myself growing uglier and uglier day by day and more and more childish day by day. My friends grow prettier and more matured and finds the drive to do stuff. I feel inferior and i tend to shut myself out frm the world and live in my own. This is so not me. I used to be able to talk things out with ppl and share abt my feelings. But now, somehow or another, i find myself alone on earth and i somehow or another have already vanished from the crowd.
Do u feel this way too? I feel miserable. Really....
posted by Charmaine at
6:29 PM
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